Social media & friendship.

 Friends can now be divided into ten distinct categories: 

1) The ones you actually meet on a regular basis, who know your profile picture was photoshopped and you never read books – it just sounds intellectual to add it to your hobbies.
2) The ones who like every single one of your photos, but don’t even know what you look like in real life. They are usually the ones who also like their own photos and statuses. Cringeworthy.
3) The ones who buy eggs from your Facebook farm (or something of the sort), but wouldn’t be able to pick them up if they were real, because they have no idea on which continent you live.

4) The ones who offer you a virtual shoulder to cry on when you’ve gone from Engaged to Single, but are secretly googling the ex hoping he’s free tomorrow night.

5) The ones who pretend not to know you when they see you at the supermarket because you’re only good enough to get their follower count up.

6) The ones who tag you in drunken photos, then tweet them to your boss “by mistake”.

7) The ones who add you as a friend because you’re the third cousin of their best friend’s wife.

8) The ones who send you twenty invitations to play Bouncing Balls, but don’t invite you to their birthday bash.

9) The ones who haven’t seen you in ten years, add you as a friend and expect you to invite them to your holiday home.

10) And finally the ones who are total strangers, but thought you looked familiar.